#vulnerability
#vulnerability
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#cybersecurity #mental-health #remote-code-execution #masculinity #friendship #emotional-health #relationships
#friendship
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
14 hours agoI'm 37 and I just realized that the reason I have no close friends isn't because I'm hard to love - it's because I learned young that needing people was dangerous - Silicon Canals
Recognizing patterns in friendships reveals a fear of vulnerability and a tendency to withdraw as relationships deepen.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoI'm 34 and have always struggled to maintain close friendships - and the most uncomfortable thing I have ever admitted to myself is that I have been the one who made them hard to maintain, not through cruelty or carelessness but through a consistent and barely conscious tendency to keep just enough distance that nobody could ever get close enough to disappoint me - Silicon Canals
Sabotaging friendships by maintaining surface-level connections prevents deeper relationships and emotional intimacy.
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoPsychology
People who are kind and intelligent but have no close friends have usually spent so long being competent in every situation that they've forgotten, or never learned, how to be helpless in front of someone - and helplessness, offered honestly, is one of the primary raw materials that close friendship has always been made from - Silicon Canals
Real friendship is built on vulnerability and connection, not competence or capability.
fromSilicon Canals
1 month agoPsychology
Psychology says people who are extremely kind but have no close friends aren't socially inept - they're operating with a version of kindness that prioritizes other people's comfort so completely that it never creates the vulnerability required for actual friendship - Silicon Canals
Vulnerability is essential for developing close friendships, yet many kind individuals struggle to initiate self-disclosure.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
14 hours agoI'm 37 and I just realized that the reason I have no close friends isn't because I'm hard to love - it's because I learned young that needing people was dangerous - Silicon Canals
Recognizing patterns in friendships reveals a fear of vulnerability and a tendency to withdraw as relationships deepen.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoI'm 34 and have always struggled to maintain close friendships - and the most uncomfortable thing I have ever admitted to myself is that I have been the one who made them hard to maintain, not through cruelty or carelessness but through a consistent and barely conscious tendency to keep just enough distance that nobody could ever get close enough to disappoint me - Silicon Canals
Sabotaging friendships by maintaining surface-level connections prevents deeper relationships and emotional intimacy.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoPeople who are kind and intelligent but have no close friends have usually spent so long being competent in every situation that they've forgotten, or never learned, how to be helpless in front of someone - and helplessness, offered honestly, is one of the primary raw materials that close friendship has always been made from - Silicon Canals
Real friendship is built on vulnerability and connection, not competence or capability.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 month agoPsychology says people who are extremely kind but have no close friends aren't socially inept - they're operating with a version of kindness that prioritizes other people's comfort so completely that it never creates the vulnerability required for actual friendship - Silicon Canals
Vulnerability is essential for developing close friendships, yet many kind individuals struggle to initiate self-disclosure.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says people who are liked by everyone but have no close friends have perfected the art of being liked without ever being known - and the distance between those two things is where their loneliness actually lives, invisible to everyone who enjoys their company and unbearable to the person providing it - Silicon Canals
Mastering likability can lead to isolation, as it prevents genuine connections and vulnerability with others.
#masculinity
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoI want to say something that my generation rarely says out loud: being tough your whole life doesn't actually protect you from loneliness - it just means you're better at hiding it from everyone, including yourself - Silicon Canals
Being tough can lead to loneliness and isolation, as it prevents genuine connections and vulnerability.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoI grew up in a family where asking for help was the same as admitting weakness - and now I'm 66 and sitting alone with problems I don't know how to solve because I never learned how to say "I'm struggling" - Silicon Canals
Asking for help is often perceived as a weakness, rooted in deep-seated beliefs about masculinity and self-reliance.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoMost men who grew up in the 1960s and 70s were taught that admitting you needed help was a character flaw. Finally, we are discovering that openness has its own kind of strength. - Silicon Canals
Men are taught to suppress emotions, leading to loneliness and health issues.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoMy father taught me how to change a tire, how to check the oil, how to patch a hole in drywall, and how to fix a running toilet - and he never once taught me how to say I love you or how to hold someone when they cry or how to admit I was scared, and I've spent my whole adult life as a man who can fix every single thing in the house except the silence sitting in the middle of it - Silicon Canals
Emotional absence can be a legacy inherited from fathers who prioritize practical skills over vulnerability and emotional expression.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
6 days agoPsychology says the people who seem impossible to offend aren't thick-skinned. They decided long ago that showing hurt gives others a map they haven't earned, so they absorb the wound and reclassify it as information - Silicon Canals
Emotional toughness often masks deep sensitivity, leading individuals to absorb pain without showing it, as vulnerability can be weaponized by others.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoPsychology says people who describe themselves as self-sufficient aren't always describing a strength. Sometimes they're describing the scar tissue that formed where the need for other people used to be, and they've carried it so long they genuinely mistake the numbness for peace. - Silicon Canals
Self-reliance is often mistaken for strength, but true strength includes the ability to seek help and share vulnerabilities.
#emotional-health
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
4 weeks agoI'm 44 and I just realized that every time someone asks me how I'm doing I say 'I'm fine' automatically - not because I'm lying but because I genuinely don't know the answer to that question - Silicon Canals
Automatic responses to greetings can prevent genuine self-reflection and connection.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoPsychology suggests that men who were told "man up" as boys don't just suppress their emotions - they develop a pattern of harmful avoidance and it's misread as strength - Silicon Canals
Emotional suppression in men leads to serious health risks and relationship issues, as societal norms discourage vulnerability and expression of feelings.
Retirement
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoI'm 66 and I spent forty years trying to stay positive through everything - and what I actually created was a life where nobody knew me well enough to notice when I was drowning - Silicon Canals
Staying positive can lead to hidden struggles and emotional isolation, as individuals often mask their true feelings to appear strong.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
4 weeks agoI'm 44 and I just realized that every time someone asks me how I'm doing I say 'I'm fine' automatically - not because I'm lying but because I genuinely don't know the answer to that question - Silicon Canals
Automatic responses to greetings can prevent genuine self-reflection and connection.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoNot everyone who keeps their personal life private is guarded. Some people tried sharing openly once, watched it become currency in someone else's conversation, and simply adjusted the distribution list permanently. - Silicon Canals
Privacy often emerges as a response to the violation of trust and openness, not as an inherent trait of individuals.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoI'm 37 and I finally figured out that vulnerability isn't saying something brave in a room full of strangers - it's telling the person who matters most that you're not okay and meaning it - Silicon Canals
True vulnerability is sharing fears with those who matter, not just public displays of emotional openness.
fromIndependent
1 week agoRichard Curran: Ireland is sleep-walking into future energy crises by refusing to plan beyond ideology
The catastrophe of the Iran war and the homegrown chaos of this week has once again laid bare the urgent need to reduce our vulnerability to the never-ending cycle of energy shocks.
World news
fromVulture
1 week agoIan McKellen and Michaela Coel Are a Perfect Mismatch in The Christophers
Julian Sklar, a star of the '60s and '70s, has spent decades in retreat, living off his notoriety and persona as an art curmudgeon, while Lori Butler, with considerable talent, struggles to make ends meet working at a food truck.
Independent films
fromIndieWire
1 week ago'Outcome' Review: Keanu Reeves Is a Troubled Movie Star in Jonah Hill's Desperate and Unfunny Comedy About the Pain of Public Opinion
Hill struggles to open up despite his unabated desire for vulnerability, feeling that he had to turn his own therapy sessions into a Netflix documentary to force himself to an uncomfortably honest place.
Independent films
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoI'm in my 30s and I just understood something about my father that therapy never gave me. He didn't withhold affection because he didn't feel it. He withheld it because in the world he came from, the moment you showed someone how much they meant to you was the moment you gave them the power to destroy you. - Silicon Canals
Emotional withholding can protect against vulnerability, revealing deeper love and care beneath perceived indifference.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoPsychology says the most emotionally strong people aren't the ones who never fall apart - they're the ones who fall apart privately, reassemble without fanfare, and never use their recovery as a reason for anyone else to feel guilty - Silicon Canals
Emotional strength involves acknowledging feelings and recovering privately, not denying vulnerability or pretending to be unbreakable.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoI'm 37 and the friendships in my life that have lasted are the ones where we stopped pretending - stopped curating what we showed each other, stopped performing the version of our lives that made sense on paper - and what replaced the pretending is the best thing I have built in the last decade - Silicon Canals
Authentic friendships emerge when individuals drop their facades and share their true struggles with each other.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoI'm 66 and I finally learned the hardest lesson isn't that people will disappoint you - it's that you'll disappoint yourself by pretending you don't need what you need until you forget what that even was - Silicon Canals
Neglecting emotional needs leads to a profound sense of loss and disconnection from oneself and others.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
3 weeks agoThe generation that taught everyone to be strong, stay busy, and never complain is now sitting in quiet living rooms wondering why nobody asks how they're actually doing - Silicon Canals
Silence was taught as a virtue, leading to struggles with vulnerability and mental health in the Silent Generation and early Boomers.
fromThe Hacker News
3 weeks agoOpen VSX Bug Let Malicious VS Code Extensions Bypass Pre-Publish Security Checks
"The pipeline had a single boolean return value that meant both 'no scanners are configured' and 'all scanners failed to run,'... So when scanners failed under load, Open VSX treated it as 'nothing to scan for' and waved the extension right through."
Information security
Environment
fromThe Art Newspaper - International art news and events
3 weeks agoDemise of world's largest mangrove forest inspires Bangladeshi artist Soma Surovi Jannat's new works
Bangladesh faces severe climate vulnerability, with rising sea levels threatening land and agriculture despite minimal global emissions contribution.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 month agoI stopped saying 'I'm fine' and started saying what was actually happening, and the most surprising result wasn't that people helped. It was how many of them visibly relaxed, like my honesty had given them permission to stop pretending too. - Silicon Canals
Vulnerability can release emotional tension in others, challenging the norm of superficial interactions.
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