'We Don't Talk' contains the following lyrics: 'I'm not sure when it happened / Not even sure what it was about,' before she adds: 'Cause we come from the same home, the same blood / A different combination, but the same lock.'
The short answer is yes, unless you take fiction for what it is-fiction. When you long for something you don't have, it can lead to dissatisfaction with what you DO have. Romantic fiction has witty, heartfelt dialogue, buckets of romantic gestures, and protagonists who have a preternatural ability to read each other's minds. It's easy to forget it is not real. This can set up unrealistic expectations both conscious and unconscious.
Stopping disagreeing isn't a sign of peace, it points to emotional withdrawal, explains Simone Bose, a relationship therapist at Relate. It happens, says Bose, because couples are likely protecting themselves from feeling disappointed or from conflict itself, but are becoming emotionally numb. Clinical psychologist and Couples Therapy star Dr Orna Guralnik agrees, noting that some people don't argue because they've come to a state of acceptance of who each other are, but some don't argue because they've given up.
My husband and I always had a pretty good sex life, but three kids in six years really left us exhausted. Happy! But so tired and so out of touch with each other. Friends would tell us to schedule date nights, but babysitters and the logistics of it made it seem overwhelming. We figured we were just in a weird stage and would get through it.
Awareness has become a kind of emotional currency in relationships. We name our attachment styles with ease, and we can explain exactly why conflict feels activating. We can trace our reactions back to our childhoods and reference therapy language fluently, sometimes impressively so. On paper, this should make relationships smoother, kinder, and more resilient. And yet, many of these same couples feel strangely stuck.
If it isn't already obvious, you probably shouldn't tell your partner what they can or cannot eat. While this should be clear under any circumstances, you especially should not do it at a restaurant in front of your waiter - but leave it to social media to test that. In a viral new trend gaining millions of likes, women on social media are asking their male partners if they can order something specific in front of their waiters, giving the impression that they usually ask their partner for their approval before ordering certain dishes. In a viral new trend gaining millions of likes, women on social media are asking their
This didn't come as a surprise, because as a teenager, I remember it exactly this way. Living parallel lives together as sisters. It was only ever the two of us, and with our ages so close together - I'm not even two years older - you might think we were inseparable. It just wasn't how it was. We were so different We were night and day different then.
Wright knew last year that he wanted to propose to Berman, and her brother had been keeping the dazzling diamond engagement ring safe for him for months. Wright was just waiting for the right moment to pop the question, and the urgent care appointment provided the perfect opportunity. The morning of Thursday, Feb. 12, Wright picked up the 3.47 carat fancy vivid yellow canary diamond ring before heading to CityMD.
"Chalant" isn't really an official word. You won't find it listed in the thesaurus as the opposite of nonchalant-just like "theless" won't be listed as the antonym of nonetheless. Nonetheless, people have been using words like "chalant" and "chalance" on social media and dating apps to describe an approach to dating that's the opposite of the nonchalance that's been fostered by some traditional dating advice and recent common dating situations like, well, situationships.
As the youngest of four, my daughter probably hasn't known a totally peaceful day since she arrived home from the hospital. She was the travel baby - waking up in her infant seat to discover she'd been carted to a school play, T-ball practice, or school pickup. She had built-in playmates right from the start, though, of course, they bickered and fought like any other siblings.
You got the selfish, non team player caring only about their own quota who will steal your work to make themselves better. Don't confuse this with being an overachiever. You got the self centered person who's time and work is more important than yours. That person also has been at the company for 600 years so they know it all and thinks they're very smart saying the same jokes over and over.
Hey guys... meet Connor! My ex boyfriend! And current fiancé!!! 💍 Thank you to everyone who made this moment possible. It was everything I ever dreamed of. Kind of like Connor!
"The 777 rule is a viral framework that encourages couples to spend consistent, intentional time together," said Julie Nguyen, a dating coach with the dating app Hily. "The guideline suggests couples to go on a date every seven days, take a weekend trip every seven weeks, and go on a longer vacation every seven months."
How did you build your village? We asked NPR's audience this question in our newsletter in January, inspired by Life Kit's interview with Priya Parker on how to create community. The key is to start imagining the community you might want to live in and then take steps to make that a reality, says Parker, a conflict resolution facilitator and the author of The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters. Many of our readers have done just that.
"Radical honesty" has become a cultural badge of honor. Across social media, couples proudly declare that they do that without filters, without private corners, seeing honesty as a black-or-white concept—full honesty or no honesty. The promise is appealing that "if we are completely transparent, our relationship will be strong and unshakable." But is total disclosure really intimacy? Does honesty contradict other values? Does radical honesty come at a cost, with other negative implications?
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently started a new job, and I feel as if my leaders don't care about my development. I ask my manager in our one-on-one meetings if there are specific things that I can work on to become more proficient at the job. She always says that I am doing well and that there's nothing in particular that I need to work on. On the surface, that sounds reassuring, but I have a feeling that it's not the full truth.
I'm fortunate to have had a dear friend ever since kindergarten. We were close all through school, and when I moved a few hours away for college and work, I would see her when I came into town to visit family. We stayed in touch and saw each other at least a few times a year. I was a bridesmaid in her wedding, and we have shared some great times together over 30-plus years.
The term "expert" usually carries highly positive connotations-someone exceptionally skilled and knowledgeable. But is such expertise always beneficial in romantic relationships? Should you marry a romantic expert? Baruch Spinoza distinguishes three levels of knowledge: Emotional-intuitive knowledge, based on the senses and imagination-often confused and unreliable. Intellectual deliberative knowledge, grounded in universal notions-true in principle, yet often incomplete in practice. Intuitive reasoning, the highest level of knowledge, which integrates emotion and intellect, culminating in what Spinoza calls the "intellectual love of God" (1677).
Getting that perfect work-life balance is important for people. They believe it will reduce stress. The truth is: it won't. Stress has nothing to do with this. There is an illusion that these two worlds, business and personal, are separate. But they aren't. You can't separate work from life. Know why? Every single business is a personal life. You don't stop being human the moment you step into your office.
STUCK IN SILENCE DEAR STUCK: You can't fix something that may not be your fault. However, before calling it quits, you can offer your husband the opportunity to get your marriage back on track with the help of a licensed marriage and family therapist. Schedule an appointment with one, and if your husband refuses to go with you, go alone.
Lauren McCadney had always wanted to live next door to friends or family. In her late 50s, she finally made that happen, though not the way she'd planned. In 2020, Lauren's mother, who had been living with her brother and his family in Frederick, Maryland, died. Lauren, who was going through a difficult divorce and doesn't have children, decided she wanted to be closer to her family and help her brother care for their dad, who was dealing with his own health challenges.
I was thirty-eight years old the first time I stopped performing at Chinese New Year dinner. Not dramatically-I didn't stand up and deliver a monologue about authenticity or announce that I was done pretending. I just stopped smiling when I wasn't amused. I stopped nodding when I disagreed. I stopped telling my aunt that her unsolicited career advice was helpful when it wasn't. I stopped pretending that the version of me sitting at that table was the real one.
Many people come to therapy with a goal to work on communication, especially with a partner. The problem, as many see it, is "poor communication," and the goal is to have "better communication." Poor communication can mean a lot of things, including ongoing and repeated conflicts, trouble expressing what we want or need, and avoidant tendencies. Therapy can work out a number of these issues. Understanding our cycle of conflict can create quicker off-ramps to repair.
Ever notice how the biggest sacrifices we make for our families are often the ones that go completely unnoticed? I've been thinking about this lately, especially as I watch friends navigate their forties and fifties. These are the years when we're supposed to have it all figured out, right? Yet they're also when we quietly give up pieces of ourselves that nobody ever really talks about.
