Are you a bona fide cycle breaker, someone who grew up in a broken or even abusive family situation and has done the work and changed everything so that your kids can have a better, happier life? First off, I salute you - I, too, didn't have great examples of marriage growing up, but with some luck and a lot of discernment, I now find myself in a very happy and healthy marriage. My young son has a much different impression of how adults get along than I ever did.
Denominator neglect happens when someone focuses on the big picture (the total number of events) while ignoring the actual harm caused by a specific one. In math terms, it's like a fraction: the numerator (top number) is the painful event that affected you, and the denominator (bottom number) is the total number of times something happened. Denominator neglect is used to downplay serious issues by minimizing their impact, shifting blame onto you, or refusing accountability.