"Are you a bona fide cycle breaker, someone who grew up in a broken or even abusive family situation and has done the work and changed everything so that your kids can have a better, happier life? First off, I salute you - I, too, didn't have great examples of marriage growing up, but with some luck and a lot of discernment, I now find myself in a very happy and healthy marriage. My young son has a much different impression of how adults get along than I ever did."
""If you are in a very happy marriage, if all your kids see is your intentionality, your collaboration, and your overall success, you need to also warn them," she says. "You need to also be very intentional about telling them that there are narcissistic people out there, that there are players out there, that there are people who will be dead-set on ruining them, because they will go out into the world and think that everyone is going to be like their mom and dad.""
Parents who model healthy, happy marriages should also proactively warn children that not all relationships look the same. Explicit conversations should identify narcissists, players, and people with harmful intentions so children do not assume every partner will mirror their parents' behavior. Children raised in stable homes can be more vulnerable because they may not recognize red flags. Providing both strong examples and candid warnings can help prepare children for a wider range of adult behavior and may prevent future harm.
Read at Scary Mommy
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