#temperament

#temperament

When my oldest son Edwin first started preschool, it was incredibly stressful. He was about 3, and it was the first time in a big classroom for him. As a sensitive, quiet child, he was very upset on the first day. He cried and clung to me, and it broke my heart to see his little hand reaching for me with tear-soaked eyes as I left him there. Needless to say, I cried too.

Humans have a strong tendency to overcorrect. Perfectionists, in particular, overcorrect by forcing themselves to become different versions of themselves, or fundamentally different people. Disdaining weakness in general, they often enter treatment to attempt to eliminate all of it. In my experience, one of the more glaring and repugnant weaknesses is people-pleasing, the tendency to go above and beyond to make others feel comfortable and/or happy.