Ever catch yourself standing in a store, holding something you genuinely want, only to put it back because that familiar knot forms in your stomach? You know the one-that creeping guilt that whispers you don't really need it, that you should save the money instead, that spending on yourself somehow makes you selfish or irresponsible. I used to think everyone felt this way about money.
Or maybe you've found yourself picking apart why someone's success "isn't that impressive" when deep down, you know you're just feeling bitter about it? I've been there. More times than I'd like to admit. And after years of digging into the psychology behind human behavior and interviewing over 200 people about their professional journeys, I've discovered something fascinating: that resentment we feel toward others' success? It's rarely about them. It's almost always about the uncomfortable truths we're avoiding about ourselves.
When we're under a lot of stress, our brains do something fascinating and often harmful to our relationships: They shift into scarcity mode. Often, people think of a scarcity mindset only as something related to our finances and resources: We don't have enough money, food, or time. But scarcity mindset, or the general belief that there isn't enough, impacts people in every area: their skills, their worth, their general capacity in life.