#body-language

#body-language

After interviewing over 200 people for various articles, I've become hypersensitive to the subtle ways trust builds or breaks in conversation. And here's what I've discovered: we all use phrases that quietly erode trust, often multiple times a day, completely unaware of the damage we're doing to our relationships and credibility. The fascinating part? These aren't obvious lies or manipulative statements. They're everyday phrases that seem harmless but trigger our brain's ancient alarm systems, making people instinctively pull back from us.

After interviewing over 200 people for various articles and keeping a notes app full of overheard coffee shop conversations, I've noticed patterns in how people behave when they secretly can't stand someone. The fascinating part? Most of us do these things without even realizing it. These micro-behaviors are so subtle that they fly under the radar, yet they speak volumes. They're the social equivalent of a poker tell, revealing what someone really thinks while maintaining that polite facade we all hide behind.

Picture this: you're having a peaceful evening with your cat curled up on your lap. You're gently stroking their soft fur, maybe watching TV or scrolling through your phone, when suddenly-out of nowhere-teeth sink into your hand. Your sweet companion has transformed into a tiny tiger, leaving you confused and maybe a little hurt.

Careful kinematic research, such as that done by a Japanese team headed by Naomi Wada, has determined that the dog's tail was designed to assist the dog with balance. When a dog is running and turns quickly, he throws the front part of his body in the direction he wants to go. This causes his back to bend; however, the forward velocity is such that his hindquarters will tend to continue in the original direction.

We've all been there: mid-story, mid-vent, mid-enthusiastic ramble, and suddenly the other person's energy shifts. Their smile fades. Their eyes wander down to their phone. Their whole body seems to quietly scream: "Please stop." Most of us don't realize when we're annoying someone. We just think we're being ourselves. We might think we're offering the type of advice our spouse really needs to hear right now.

"We develop close relationships with many coworkers, but there is still that boundary that needs to be respected," she told BI. "It's inappropriate to spread any rumors about other people at the office."

This could be a displacement activity to process the nervous energy. Additionally, oxytocin is the love hormone released through physical contact. Sometimes people will do things like stroke their beard to self-comfort.

While there's limited evidence that making yourself bigger directly boosts confidence, there is strong evidence that making yourself smaller can have the opposite effect.

"Pushing your partner in the face with your hand so hard their head reels to the side... should not be normalized by calling it 'fun' just to save political face."

"Blake seems to be investing more when it comes to doing the heavy lifting of looking happy and amiable... they’re not seeming to project any sense of an easy-going relationship here."