Everybody wants to flourish-to experience joyful, meaningful, shared growth. The problem is, we've been trained to approach the most important parts of our lives as if they are games to win, when they're more like gardens to be grown. Flourishing isn't about being smarter-it's about taking simple actions that foster the ecosystem of your life.
A little bit about myself. In my previous life, I was staff platform engineering. I focused a lot of development engineering and everything that basically was the sociotechnical aspect of our technical work. I recently was working as a CTO and co-founder of a startup, and nowadays I'm just doing advisory roles and a little bit of consulting while trying to think about the next big thing. Yes, so happy to be talking with you, Shane.
My daughter, Ivy, recently joined a swim club. As a former competitive swimmer, it's been a delight to witness. Every time I take her to practice, I feel a wave of nostalgia that reminds me of all the many years I spent in the pool and all the many teammates I collected along the way. It excites me to think that she, too, will have her own experiences and life lessons, just as swimming taught me.
No wonder it feels personal that this team rejects your efforts. It is personal; it's happening to you. But it's not about you. This team might have so much internal tension that they can't stand to be in a meeting together. Maybe they had a bad experience with your predecessor. They might think they know it all already and attending meetings is just wasting their time. Or it could really be as straightforward as what they've told you: Their working hours and training times are already used up.