Asking Eric: I was envious, so I told a hurtful story. How do I stop myself from doing this?
Briefly

The letter writer reflects on her feelings of inadequacy stemming from her father's belittling behavior during childhood, exacerbated by familial dynamics where her husband's writing received praise while hers went unnoticed. This led to self-sabotaging behavior in an attempt to diminish her husband's achievements. Acknowledging this pattern is the first step toward healing. The response encourages her to explore her feelings through therapy and journaling and suggests joining a writer's group to find supportive peers and perspective on her identity as a writer.
As a writer, you well know that a character is often tripped up by the flaws that they're unaware of and unwilling to change.
Identifying the traps that have been laid for you will help you find tools for avoiding them, removing them and making new patterns.
Look into a writer's group, locally or online. We all need praise and encouragement (and sometimes commiseration).
You're cresting the hill on the plot arc and heading, hopefully, toward a happy resolution.
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