The author reflects on the challenges of supporting a partner grieving the loss of their father, particularly as they exhibit avoidance of sadness. This dynamic leads to tension in their relationship, as the author values emotional processing while the partner prefers to shield themselves from painful feelings. Highlighting insights from psychotherapist John-Paul Davies, the author emphasizes that embracing sadness is essential for genuine happiness and emotional well-being. They seek methods to harmonize their partner’s needs with their own desire for emotional connection and support, aiming for a healthier relationship.
It feels as if I have to sacrifice my own interests and emotional availability to preserve their needs a lot of the time.
What I learned early on in this job is that humans are not like fuse boxes; you can't isolate one switch: if you numb one emotion, you dampen all of them.
In order to experience happiness, we also need to be able to experience sadness.
Human beings aren't built for happiness, they're built for survival; happiness has to be worked at.
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