Accepting that your parents aren't going to change and that means they're going to let you down will help you as much as it frustrates you.
Separate out what you actually want from holidays. Put aside the things that feel like obligations.
It's not your job to satisfy everyone's expectations. A restaurant may actually be a better solution, as the cost is shared, and people can order what they want.
If you're not in therapy, you may want to talk through your feelings with someone. It will help bring clarity.
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