The author seeks advice on how to handle friends who frequently complain about various issues, creating discomfort in their relationship. After hinting at their high standards, the friends are unaware of how their consistent complaints affect others, leading to dwindling social connections. While the author wishes to avoid conflict, it’s suggested that honest communication could help both parties understand and potentially improve the dynamics. Rather than ignoring the complaints, addressing the behavior may allow for a clearer path forward in the friendship.
There's a big difference between you have high standards (can be read as positive; pins the problem on everyone else's low standards) and a lot of what you say comes across as complaints (accurate).
Your friends may not realize how much they complain, but they know something is up. The woman's question about if you still like her could be read as a sincere attempt to figure out what's wrong in your relationship.
Polite evasion and a slow backing away won't really help you or them. It's important to communicate how their behavior impacts your relationship.
By telling her what you experience and how it impacts the relationship, you'd be giving her the opportunity to reflect on her behavior.
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