The article critiques the popular saying "forgive and forget" in the context of trauma recovery, highlighting that true forgiveness involves remembering the offense, not erasing it. For trauma survivors, being urged to forgive can be detrimental, as forgetting means there's nothing to forgive. Real forgiveness reflects a change in feelings towards the offender, rather than an absence of memory. The author emphasizes that recovery for trauma survivors does not depend on forgiveness, suggesting that they should follow their own path toward healing without outside pressure to forgive.
Genuine forgiveness requires memory; forgetting an offense means one is not forgiving but simply erasing the event from memory.
Trauma survivors should not feel pressured to forgive, as their recovery doesn't necessarily hinge on this process.
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