"Dear Prudence, I have an amazing best friend, and we've been in each other's lives since we were in middle school. We're now in our 30s. She's in a serious relationship with a good guy. I'm very happy for her, and it looks like they're going to get engaged soon. She has mentioned many times that she wants me as her maid of honor. She was the MOH at my wedding last year. So, what's the problem?"
"She has a twin sister with whom I don't get along (that will likely also be a bridesmaid). It's a long story, but I started therapy over some of her behavior toward me, and we are no contact. My best friend understands and supports me. She knows that we don't get along (and to be fair, she doesn't even get along with her own twin)."
A lifelong best friend faces an upcoming engagement and repeated requests to serve as maid of honor despite longstanding no-contact with the bride's twin sister. The boundary arose after therapy addressing the twin's behavior, and the friend supports and understands the no-contact decision. The writer worries about encountering the twin at bachelorette and wedding events, sharing personal contact information, and causing stress by accepting the MOH role. The period before a proposal offers an opportunity to discuss options and boundaries openly, treat each other as regular people, and begin with an honest opening that expresses excitement and concerns about wedding stress.
Read at Slate Magazine
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