The article discusses the immense pressures placed on modern parents, drawing parallels between parenting expectations and those of romantic partners. Parents are viewed as needing to fulfill multifaceted roles—therapists, educators, and emotional guides—creating a scenario where they can be heavily criticized by their adult children for perceived failures. This situation exacerbates estrangement, as many adult children reflect on how different parenting might have influenced their lives. The piece emphasizes the cultural shift towards intense parenting while also advocating for a balance of accountability and forgiveness within family dynamics.
You didn't see that I was depressed when I was growing up and I suffered as a result. I can't have a relationship with you because it's too triggering. Please respect my boundaries.
In this paradigm, parents are expected to be therapists, learning specialists, coaches, and emotional support systems all at once. They are supposed to anticipate and address every potential issue that might impede their child's long-term happiness.
This framework offers the now grown child a blank slate to imagine who they might have become with different or 'better' parents.
Over the past four decades, helicopter or intensive parenting has become the norm across the classes in the U. S. and in other countries with high rates of mental health issues.
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