The author reflects on the depth of grief experienced after the loss of her mother in 2011, which unearthed buried pain linked to past trauma. Initially unaware, she later identified her struggles as complex PTSD (cPTSD), resulting from prolonged exposure to trauma. This chaotic phase forced her to confront her emotional turmoil and resulted in reckless behaviors and relationship breakdowns. Therapy helped her understand her traumatic childhood and the complex relationship with her mother, paving the way for healing and self-discovery amidst the struggle.
In 2011, my world shattered. My mother passed away, and with her, the fragile scaffolding that held my life together.
cPTSD is a condition that often results from prolonged exposure to trauma, leaving deep emotional scars which manifest as a constant state of hypervigilance.
I was living through what some call the "dark night of the soul," a period of profound spiritual and emotional crisis.
Growing up, my relationship with my mother was complicated. There were no displays of affection or love, leaving me feeling unseen and unworthy.
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