At a dinner party, the hostess had set a lovely table with flowers and candles. I complimented her on the setting. Later, as dinner started, I found the flowers blocking my view of the guest across from me, preventing any potential conversation... She moved them, but muttered loud enough for everyone to hear that she had set a beautiful table and I was ruining the look.
If it happens again, you could repeat your compliment of the flowers when asking that they be moved, or perhaps get a firm grip on them as you make the request.
Your husband was suggesting you did anything wrong, Miss Manners will disagree. But perhaps he was merely suggesting that... her reaction was predictable: You were lucky she did not lower the level of the flowers by emptying the vase into your lap.
Avoidance or its more persistent cousin, procrastination often leads to confirmation bias. Your friend wants you to confirm something, and, if given no evidence to the contrary, will decide that you have.
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