My husband and I have what one could call a "traditional" marriage: He works, and I tend the home. Since we're child-free and I already finished college, I suppose you could call me a trophy wife, but firstly, I'm nonbinary, and secondly, that's the rub. On paper, not much: I read a lot, I tend to my hobbies, I attempt to bake, and I spend time with my husband.
He has supported me through tough life events, and I have supported him through his own. Wilson has encouraged me to stand up to my abusive mother and given me the strength to set boundaries. He shows me his love not in big flashy gestures, but in the quiet, meaningful moments when I need him. We have had conversations about our future and how we want our lives to look. In every conversation, it seems like we are on the same page.
I really feel like the cultural norm around proposals is fundamentally silly and outdated. I wish more people would consider that women can propose too! It doesn't have to come from the male partner in heterosexual relationships. I asked my now-husband to marry me, and it was the best choice I've ever made. I think it's really interesting that this wasn't even mentioned in your advice-which goes to show how embedded this heteronormative idea about who gets to propose really is.
I emailed her dad, asking when would be a good time for me to come over to talk. He sent me a bunch of Bible quotes. I told him I'd like to have a conversation with him and her mother. He sent me an email lecture about sex outside of marriage. OK, I thought, maybe I need to be more explicit. Next email: Subject: I want to marry your daughter. His reply: We can't bless that union.
You didn't just lose a husband-you also folded yourself into his family's grief and stood beside them through their darkest moments. Those ties don't simply disappear because life moves forward. Knowing that firsthand, I want to acknowledge the very human dilemma you are facing. You're balancing loyalty to someone who has been family for a long time with the commitment you are now making to a new partner. These are not simple emotional shifts. They require courage, clarity, empathy, and a whole lot of heart.
And ever since the dating app Plenty of Fish included it as a trend in its annual report last year, it appears to have kicked off in a big way. People are going on dates at the gym. They're going on gardening dates. They're even turning the weekly shop into a date. This is so depressing. Where's the romance? That's
