"Picture this: You're sitting across from your adult child at dinner, and there's that familiar pause. The one where they start to say something, then take a sip of water instead. You've seen this dance a hundred times. They're holding back, swallowing words that would probably sting if they let them out. As someone who spent years in therapy unpacking my own parent stuff (third time was the charm with finding the right therapist),"
"I've heard countless friends share what they wish they could tell their parents but never will. The therapy waiting rooms are full of thirty-somethings working through the same frustrations, and the patterns are almost eerily consistent. Here's the thing: your kids love you. But love doesn't erase the small resentments that build up over decades. These aren't relationship-ending grievances, but they're the splinters that make every family gathering just a little uncomfortable."
Adult children frequently hold back honest criticisms during family interactions, creating strained pauses and withheld words. Many thirty-somethings seek therapy to unpack recurring parental behaviors that feel controlling or infantilizing. Treating grown children like teenagers with reminders, unsolicited advice, and interventions communicates distrust of their competence. Parents often intend help, but adult children perceive these actions as control rather than care. Small, accumulated resentments from repeated behaviors make family gatherings uncomfortable. Clear boundaries and respect for adult autonomy are necessary to reduce these persistent relational splinters.
Read at Silicon Canals
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