A six-type framework categorizes common mother-in-law behaviors and clarifies what each type wants, how each typically acts, and suggested responses. Labels aim to identify relational patterns rather than to diagnose personality disorders. Understanding these behavior groups helps couples recognize recurring dynamics, set healthier boundaries, and choose constructive strategies to reduce conflict. One illustrated type, the Martyr, appears dutiful and giving while feeling guilt and obligation, often responding with passive-aggressive remarks when perceived sacrifices go unappreciated. Practical guidance focuses on recognizing patterns and selecting appropriate, relationship-preserving actions to move interactions forward.
Mother-in-law disputes are nothing new; generations of daughters-in-law have wondered what on earth they did to deserve the MIL they got (whether that's good or bad). But now, there's a new system for figuring out exactly what type of behavior your mother-in-law is displaying - and how you can cope. In her forthcoming book You, Your Husband & His Mother, psychologist Dr. Tracy Dalgleish lays out six different types of mother-in-law, what each one wants, how she acts, and what you can do in response.
And I caveat these six types by saying that they're not diagnoses. People who have maybe labeled their mother-in-law as narcissistic might notice some of those flavorings in there, but I haven't used the word narcissism in these six different types for the reason - it's not helpful to go to your husband and say, 'Look, this book says your mom is a narcissist.'
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