"My husband and I, married nine years. We got married because I was pregnant so we didn't exactly discuss long-term plans at the time. I am 44 and he is 52, and we have a difference of opinion regarding the future. His lifelong goal is to own a large ranch and have a smattering of livestock that he can putter around with on a day-to-day basis along with staying partially engaged in the construction company we currently own and run."
"The bigger issue is that generally, people talk about these things before they get married, and both parties want to grow together in the same direction. Marriage is not just about agreeing to be parents together, it's about a commitment to live and change together over time. If you didn't think about it that way when you got married, because your primary impetus was pregnancy,"
A married couple faces divergent retirement goals: one partner wants to maintain and live on a large ranch with livestock, while the other prefers smaller, low-maintenance housing and frequent travel or a beach second home. They currently live on five acres with multiple animals and have a youngest child who will graduate high school in nine years, which affects timing. Financial capacity determines whether ranch life, travel, and a beach retreat can coexist. Long-term alignment typically requires prior discussion and a shared commitment to grow together. Deliberate planning, honest communication, and compromise can create a realistic path forward.
Read at Slate Magazine
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