A mother expressed her disinterest in having grandchildren after a lifetime of caregiving. Upon her child's pregnancy announcement, she was distant and silent, reflecting her past experiences of solitude in raising her children. Despite a strained relationship, the new mother brought her baby unannounced to her mother, initiating a reconnection. Over 40 days together, the mother helped adapt but remained emotionally reserved. As time passed, the relationship shifted from tension to affection, leading to healing for both the mother and daughter.
When I got pregnant, my mother wasn't excited, and she remained distant. She eventually came around to love my child, healing our mother-daughter relationship.
She also didn't want our relationship to change. In her mind, she had earned her place - front and center in my life. So, a grandchild, to her, felt like competition.
I showed up with my newborn, unannounced. In our Swahili culture, it's normal for a new mom to stay with her mother for 40 days after birth to recover.
When she saw us, she looked confused. She didn't know what to say. She'd also forgotten how to look after a newborn, and I was a first-time mom, so it felt like we had to start from scratch.
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