A person ended a relationship and continued living with an ex and shared pets. The breakup was brief, but the ex quickly began meeting strangers for sex and later hosted an orgy while lying about it. The person grieved, journaled, meditated, became sober, and focused on exercise and creative outlets, including lip-sync videos. One video circulated online and included hashtags referencing cheating. A mutual friend sent a “Do better” message and unfriended the person, creating guilt about whether posting was irresponsible or immature. The person questions whether a moral high road exists for revealing a cheating ex on social media and whether they could have done better.
"Two days later, he started meeting strangers from Grindr for sex, lying to my face about it. He then hosted an orgy in a hotel room. I caught him cheating several times in the past. Each time I'd confront him, he'd lie. I spent a few weeks grieving, journaling, and meditating while he continued to have sex to mask his pain. I got sober and went to the gym every day."
"Dormant creativity sprouted to life. I found joy lip-syncing to my favorite songs. One of my videos circulated online where my ex's loved ones, not to mention near strangers, watched. I sang songs that spoke to our situation and used #cheatingex, #glowup as some of the hashtags."
"Soon after, I received a DM from a mutual friend. "Do better." The friend then unfriended me. Better than what? He was the one who cheated. I stayed faithful. He immediately started screwing strangers. All I did was make a TikTok to cope, to process, to heal."
"I felt vulnerable posting anything else. Suddenly, sharing what was not my burden but my ex's dysfunction in the public eye felt irresponsible, no matter how cathartic it was. I wasn't doing it to be petty, and yet I felt immature. But why? I didn't cause his cheating. If anything, sharing the sordid details even inadvertently should have been powerful."
Read at Slate Magazine
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