"I did remarry briefly a few years ago, but that chapter was short-lived. At this stage of my life, I feel genuinely content. I'm on my own, but by no means lonely. I have a fulfilling balance between work and personal life, and I'm deeply grateful for my three daughters and my grandchildren, who bring me joy and purpose. My question is: how do I make people understand that I'm happy as I am?"
"Friends and family often tell me I need to find someone, or that I shouldn't be on my own, as if my single status must mean something is missing. Some assume I'm simply waiting to meet the right person, but that's not the case. Their comments are beginning to wear me down, leaving me questioning myself and feeling low at times."
"What a hard time people have when someone says: I don't need that to be happy. Anyone whose life deviates from mainstream expectations gets this, even from well-meaning loved ones. Wait, you're saying you don't need a lot of money to be happy? Why aren't you making more choices in pursuit of money? Oh, you're saying you don't need kids to be happy? But what will you do about having kids?"
A 54-year-old expresses contentment with single life, strong family connections, and a balanced work-personal life. Friends and family repeatedly suggest that a partner is necessary, implying something is missing. These well-meaning but presumptive comments erode confidence and cause occasional low moods. Cultural expectations normalise pressuring others about relationships, often through patronising questions that assume mainstream goals. Clear boundaries, calm pushback, and selective exposure to people who respect choices help preserve emotional wellbeing. Rehearsed responses, changing the subject, and prioritising supportive relationships maintain peace and independence while filtering out unsolicited advice.
Read at www.theguardian.com
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