"Pillemer has spent over two decades distilling wisdom from older adults into usable advice. Through his Cornell Legacy Project, Pillemer has talked with more than 1,500 Americans in their 80s, 90s, and even 100s to capture their wisdom about living. The project represents the largest systematic collection of elder wisdom ever assembled. Last month, Pillemer was a guest on The Mel Robbins Podcast, one of the most popular podcasts across the globe."
"When Pillemer asked these elders what people should do to avoid reaching old age with regrets, several themes consistently emerged. The number one regret: wasting precious time worrying about things that never happened. The older adults in the project had lived through the Great Depression, World War II, and countless personal challenges. They were unified in their message: Worry rarely changes outcomes but always steals joy from the present moment."
Karl Pillemer collected life advice from over 1,500 Americans in their 80s, 90s, and 100s through the Cornell Legacy Project, creating the largest systematic repository of elder wisdom. The elders emphasize that happiness results from choices rather than possessions. Regrets center on wasted time, excessive worrying about events that never occurred, and missed opportunities to say “I love you” or seize chances. Not one elder listed lack of money or possessions as a major regret. The elders recommend saying yes to opportunities, prioritizing meaningful work, nurturing shared values in partnerships, and expressing love openly to live without major regrets.
Read at Psychology Today
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