Harriette Cole: My sister is stalking again, and I can't deal with it
Briefly

Harriette Cole: My sister is stalking again, and I can't deal with it
"Last week, we had a video call to catch up and discuss her upcoming birthday, and she started showing me screenshots from her partner's social media accounts. He was on a trip with friends, and my sister had become paranoid because his communication was minimal. Whenever she gets like this, I find it hard to talk to her. I don't want to investigate; I don't even really care."
"How often does she take people's efforts to live their lives as an affront to her personally? She would benefit tremendously from therapy, where she can unpack her behavior and the behaviors of her friends and lovers to get to the truth. Tell her that her relationship machinations are above your pay grade. You do not know how to help her, and you cannot take on the burden of listening. Encourage her to go to therapy."
A sibling reports exhaustion from a sister's recurring toxic relationship behaviors, including obsessing, overthinking, online stalking, and paranoia when a partner reduces communication. The sister shares screenshots during video calls and becomes anxious, prompting the sibling to disengage and question readiness for relationship accountability. Advice recommends recognizing the sister's patterns as a primary source of toxicity, urging therapy to unpack personal behavior and relational dynamics. The sibling is advised to set boundaries by stating the issue is beyond their capacity to manage, to refuse emotional burden, and to direct the sister toward professional help.
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