""When you don't say what needs to be said in the moment to spare somebody else's feelings, first of all, like, you're rejecting the truest part of yourself," Paltrow said. "And then it's going to come out another way. And that's like, you'll end up being dishonest. You'll end up not saying what needs to be said. You'll end up stringing out some lame relationship for eight extra months and treating them not so nicely because you have stuck yourself in something, you know, you just make a mess," she said."
""I worked with a coach on how to hold the uncomfortable feelings of disappointing somebody else," Paltrow said. "I really had a problem with men. Like, when I worked with men, I had a really hard time disappointing them or saying something that wasn't aligned with their version of things.""
""Well, I'm a recovering codependent. So, I used to do anything and everything not to say the thing that would make the waters choppy," Paltrow told host Amy Poehler."
Gwyneth Paltrow recognized a long-standing pattern of codependency and people-pleasing that led her to avoid saying difficult truths. She worked with a coach to learn how to hold the uncomfortable feelings that come from disappointing somebody else. The avoidance of honest communication produced self-rejection, dishonesty, and extended unhealthy relationships. Paltrow noted particular difficulty disappointing men and aligning with their versions of things. Through coaching and practice she learned to speak truthfully in ways that honor herself and prevent the eventual fallout of unspoken feelings.
Read at Business Insider
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