"While this is possible in some cases, it's much harder with perfectionism, where few external things or experiences elicit joy because few of them live up to your standards. So, hoping for immediate gratification is akin to a dice roll. It isn't that it never happens; it's that it can't be relied on."
"However, since perfectionists are overthinkers (i.e., people who think deeply about topics, even when unnecessary), it's possible to use the ability to project yourself into the future and your ability to take a bird's-eye view to your advantage. On its own, overthinking isn't good or bad; the label depends on your goals, even if unconscious."
"If overthinking is making you worry about the distant future or obsess over your essence, whether you're truly a good or bad person, then it should be considered harmful. However, if used to assess meaning and cultivate joy, then it's a necessity."
Perfectionists struggle to find joy in immediate experiences because few meet their high standards, making external gratification unreliable. Unlike cognitive behavior therapy's approach of replacing negative thoughts with positive ones, perfectionists often seek external experiences to quiet their overactive minds. However, this strategy rarely works due to perfectionist standards. Instead, perfectionists can harness their natural tendency to overthink by using it constructively—projecting into the future and gaining bird's-eye perspective on their lives. Overthinking itself is neutral; its value depends on application. When used to assess meaning and cultivate joy rather than worry obsessively, overthinking becomes essential for perfectionists to find fulfillment and understand how their experiences matter.
Read at Psychology Today
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