8 Myths About Emotional Intelligence

"It might seem strange to need a permission slip for something so central to the human experience. Yet it can be transformative to stop treating emotions as unwanted guests and instead welcome them as integral companions on our journeys. In fact, Brackett has found that this magnanimous attitude toward our inner world is also what we long for in the outer world-in each other's company."

"In the early 1990s, psychologists Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer introduced the concept of emotional intelligence as a subset of social intelligence (initially described as "the ability to understand and manage people"). They defined emotional intelligence as "the ability to monitor one's own and others' feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one's thinking and actions" (Salovey & Mayer, 1990, p. 189)."

Imagining an adversary as a character in a movie is a psychological distancing technique that can reduce conflict and create perspective. Emotions should be befriended and normalized rather than treated as unwanted guests. Welcoming emotions as integral companions can transform inner experience and aligns with a social desire for empathetic connection. People seeking support typically want an emotional ally who listens nonjudgmentally and shows empathy and compassion rather than someone to fix problems. Emotional intelligence is defined as the ability to monitor one's own and others' feelings, discriminate among them, and use that information to guide thinking and actions. Learning emotional intelligence centers on five core skills.

Read at Psychology Today