I'm the oldest of 8 kids, including 5 foster siblings. There are pros and cons to my big family.

"I remember the stares most of all. In the grocery store, people tried to make sense of my family - how these Black, Hispanic, and white children all belonged to the same woman. The insatiably curious strangers would stop my mother to comment on her "beautiful family," hoping she'd explain us. She never did. I love that she never felt she owed anyone an explanation for her children."

"We didn't fit the box of a "nice little American family." My younger siblings might've been too young to notice people's stares, but I wasn't. I saw the disapproving looks when my 2-year-old foster sister dumped a carton of eggs onto the grocery store floor or melted down in the cereal aisle. It was humbling to feel different. To feel like you were "that family." The one that stood out for the wrong reasons. In hindsight, it taught me empathy at an early age."

I am the oldest of eight children, including five who began as foster siblings, and the household was always busy with pros and cons. Growing up taught a scarcity mindset alongside abundant familial love. Strangers often stared and asked questions about the racially mixed sibling group, but my mother refused to provide explanations. My parents began with three biological children, then fostered and later adopted five more, changing family size over time. Not fitting societal expectations led to early lessons in humility and empathy, and I now try to make others feel comfortable being imperfect.

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