I Had PPD. Here are 6 Ways You Can Help A Mom Going Through It.

Postpartum depression is not caused by a mother or by people around her, and questions about whether someone did something wrong should be avoided. Reassuring others that the condition is beyond their control can take attention away from the support the mother needs. Help should be specific rather than vague, because many tasks can be outsourced or paid for, which can increase guilt when asking for assistance. Asking for help can be harder than accepting it, so “let me know if you need help” may not work for a new mother with postpartum depression. Practical, targeted offers reduce barriers and provide meaningful relief.

"Don't ask if you did something wrong. This is a common and well-intended concern when someone you care about is suffering. Did I contribute to this? Could I have done something differently to avoid this outcome? The answers are no and no. No one can cause PPD, not the mother going through it or those around her. Hormones, sleep deprivation and the resulting emotional stress are the reason, not whether or not you dropped off a casserole in the week following her child's birth."

"When I finally began opening up about my condition to those around me, I found myself spending the majority of the conversations consoling the other person and reassuring them that this was beyond their control. It didn't make my situation worse, but it certainly didn't help things, either. Bottom line: It's not because of you, so don't ask."

"Be specific with your offers to help. When someone has a baby, people want to help. But remember, we live in a culture where help can be ordered and paid for. Food and groceries, laundry services, dog walkers and anything else you can think of. And because of that convenience and ease, we feel enormous guilt asking someone to help with something that we feel we can pay for."

"For many of us, the only thing harder than accepting help is asking for it in the first place. And while your "let me know if you need help" offer is truly kind, it's not realistic that a new mom with PPD will call you up and say, "hey, remember when you aske"

Read at Scary Mommy