"We start the bedtime routine at 7 p.m., and it lasts until 8:15 p.m. or 8:30 p.m. most nights. This includes about 20 minutes of overseeing the toothbrushing and general bedtime prep, and then I spend about 20 minutes of one-on-one time with each of my three kids, in reverse age order. The kids are welcome to read in their beds until they're sleepy enough to turn off the light,"
"I desperately need an hour or two of complete solo time to wind down at night, and I have to turn out the light by 10 p.m. if I have any hope of feeling semi-rested the next day. But my tween likes to wander into my bedroom around 9 p.m. or 9:30 p.m. for one last goodnight. But it's not just a quick hug-she jumps into bed."
Bedtime routine begins at 7 p.m. and typically ends around 8:15–8:30 p.m., including toothbrushing, general prep, and 20 minutes of one-on-one time with each of three children. Younger children fall asleep independently and wake before 6 a.m. The parent requires an hour or two of solo wind-down time and must be in bed by 10 p.m. to feel rested. A tween repeatedly returns to the parent's bedroom around 9–9:30 p.m. for extended contact, often staying in bed, watching screens over the parent's shoulder, or initiating serious conversations. Previous strategies—combining bedtime, moving bedtime earlier, and calm conversations about needs—have not resolved the late-night intrusions, leading to frequent in-the-moment escalation.
Read at Slate Magazine
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