In her book 'How to Be Enough,' Ellen Hendriksen examines the dual nature of perfectionism. While it can be driven by conscientiousness, leading to significant achievements, it often turns unhealthy when individuals tie their self-worth to their performance. This mindset leads them to chase admiration and status, which ultimately isolates them instead of fostering genuine acceptance. Hendriksen advocates for self-acceptance and understanding the difference between admiration and true belonging, emphasizing the importance of being kinder to oneself to counteract perfectionist tendencies.
Unhealthy perfectionism tells us a lie: that we can connect, belong, and be accepted by being good at things through performance.
Perfectionism has a healthy heart because its core is conscientiousness, which is the tendency to be responsible and diligent.
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