The article discusses the complexities of supporting a sister who has taken on a parentified role within the family due to a challenging upbringing. The main speaker reflects on their relationship with their older sister, which has become strained as she copes with stress from her own children and a tough relationship with her partner. A psychotherapist emphasizes the importance of understanding the family dynamics, where the older sister may feel overwhelmed by her role. It's crucial to approach support sensitively, recognizing her vulnerabilities as a flawed peer rather than an idealized parental figure.
Zooming out a bit and trying to get a gauge of the broader family context, I wonder whether your sister was the 'parentified' child within your family that is, placed in a parental role and took on the emotional responsibility for her two younger siblings.
Parentified children can often be excessively self-reliant and also resentful, especially if they become mothers. This is not something for you to fix, but it might offer context.
It is important to think about how and where you contact her: So often the tone and intention of something sensitive like this can be lost in a message.
You may need to readjust to the fact that your sister is not an ideal parental figure but actually a flawed peer who is vulnerable herself.
Collection
[
|
...
]