I always told my kids that whoever you marry is going to make the family gathering on Christmas morning better for 50 years or worse for 50 years. You are not just choosing someone that you are attracted to... You're choosing someone that's going to enhance or destroy Christmas for the next 50 years.
It's better when their spouses are there. They're peacemakers. They add a lot of joy and fun, and great conversation. They're great listeners, they bridge things, they ask questions, they bring joy, they're not moody, they're positive, they're helpful. So when you're looking for someone you're looking for someone that does all those things for the family.
Now, granted (as some commenters have pointed out), you can't choose someone based exclusively on whether you think they're going to blend well with your family: you're starting your own family unit. But hopefully they'll still be involved in your family and traditions.
Many commenters agreed, either from positive experiences or negative ones.
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