Directness may not feel great in the moment, but it'll likely be the most effective way to reset your group. One of you should have a conversation.
You’ve been meeting for 35 years, and old rhythms are hard to break. Explain that the group dynamic changed in a way original members aren't comfortable with.
If possible, offer an alternative to the new member or consider meeting separately. But this could be much more hurtful if he discovers clandestine gatherings without him.
It’s best to acknowledge the truth: Some changes do not work out, and ultimately having a direct conversation could help reset group dynamics.
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