The letter writer is dealing with profound grief after her husband's suicide, particularly compounded by his infidelity and the manipulative actions of his affair partner. Despite the heartbreak, she must navigate her relationship with her stepsons, who are unaware of the full story. The response emphasizes the importance of maintaining clarity and truth without engaging in further conflict. It suggests that while preserving the memories of her husband is vital, addressing the lies and manipulations of the affair partner may be necessary for the sake of her relationship with her stepsons.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with the shock and disorientation of the affair and the lies on top of the grief of surrounding your husband's suicide.
You know the truth, no matter what the affair partner says. This person seems very manipulative, perhaps dangerously so.
If you fear that he's taking advantage of your stepsons, talk to them calmly and privately. Tell them that the things the man has said about you aren't true.
Your stepsons are adults and can handle the truth, if they ask further questions.
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