#social-connection

#social-connection

Dog ownership has increased dramatically in many western countries. For example, in the UK there has been an increase from around 8.3 million in 2011 to 13.5 million in 2025. That means that approximately 29% of UK adults own a dog! At least partially this increasing trend of owning a dog is linked to millennials being more likely to have children later in life.

When our family moved to Oregon from Southern California in 1974 for my husband's new job, I fell in love with the Pacific Northwest. But there was one problem: There wasn't enough sunshine or swimming pools - both of which I had enjoyed in California. When the community college where I taught offered free memberships at a new gym, I quickly signed up. I expected exercise, but I got so much more.

When I visited flourishing groups, I noticed that being with them felt different. They possessed a vibrancy, a switched-on responsiveness that showed up in their bodies. Their posture, in general, was relaxed; their heads were up and their interactions were fluid. Aliveness was the word I kept writing in my notebook: a feeling of being carried along in a river of energy that was headed somewhere good.

"I feel like it was easier to connect with other transplants," she said. "Everyone seemed to revolve around hobby-based communities."

People say it takes a village to do difficult things: raise a child, sustain a community, build a barn. But we don't often talk a lot about what it takes to be a villager. What does it mean to not just be in a community, but to help create one? Priya Parker, author of The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters, says the key is to put yourself out there, even if it's scary.

At first glance, that statistic might seem to confirm a familiar narrative about modern life. People are isolated. Communities have weakened. Technology has replaced relationships. But the data tells a more precise story. Most Americans want connection. Many are actively looking for it. What they are running into instead are systems that make connection hard to access and harder to sustain.

Remote work is amazing and so is pizza. But you shouldn't eat pizza every day and you shouldn't work from home every day either. As an introvert I hate small talk and loud spaces, so when remote work became the default during COVID, it felt like the world had finally adjusted to me. No commute, no noise and no forced conversations. I could work in silence with my cat on my lap.

If you're someone who rejoices at self-serve checkouts, automated banking, or online shopping-and I'll admit, I tick two out of three of these boxes-have you ever stopped to think about how taxing these shifts might be on the incidental social interactions we have with others? Recently, while reading Why Brains Need Friends: The Neuroscience of Social Connection-And Why We All Need More, I realised just how much these incidental social opportunities are diminishing.

Few experiences are more emotionally and psychologically taxing than feeling that you don't matter. You might sense it when you're talked over in a meeting, when no one asks for your opinion, when you work hard, but your efforts aren't acknowledged, when your teenage child no longer wants to spend time with you, or upon retirement, when that inevitable question sneaks in: Does anyone need me?

Humans have an innate need to build and maintain meaningful relationships, and in today's digital world, many of these connections increasingly unfold through technology,

and the viral " dopamine menu " trend that perks you up enough to be productive. While a zing of the well-known hormone always feels good, it's said that oxytocin is what makes you feel really great. On TikTok, creators are talking about the importance of boosting your oxytocin, especially in the winter when it's common to feel isolated or sad, and they're proving it's so much more than just a "love hormone."

Across every measure, from health to economic productivity to civic trust, America's social fabric is fraying. Nearly half of U.S. adults report feeling lonely; only one in five employees say they have a close friend at work; and according to the Pew Research Center declining trust costs the economy an estimated 1-2% of GDP each year through friction and inefficiency. The U.S. Surgeon General has warned that loneliness now rivals smoking in its impact on health.

They naturally turn dinner into a shared experience, and You never know who you'll be seated next to; that's the fun of it! The fun of having dinner interrupted by someone explaining loudly that their therapist says they're a highly sensitive empath as they elbow you in the face reaching for the soy sauce? Or being squeezed next to a Hyrox bore chomping chicken breasts to fuel his farmer's carries?

If you are like most people, the thought of longevity means focusing on your physical health. And usually, that boils down to diet to optimize physical health. But did you know there is something even more important we should focus on? Our social health. The whispers about our social connections being a key to living healthy to 100 are becoming screams.

Social isolation has been rising in the United States for the past two decades, which was only exacerbated by the COVID pandemic. This has long been a growing public health concern (Office of the Surgeon General, 2023). The strength of social connection has been shown to be a strong short- and long-term predictor of mental and physical health (OSG, 2023).

The moon is in diplomatic and symmetry-loving Libra all day, so it's a great time to chit-chat about your feelings and focus on emotional reciprocity. Sharing is just as important as listening, so do a little of both today. Pay attention to the themes that naturally surface, as you may begin to feel the first glimmers of the new moon energy that's incoming on Tuesday.

It turns out that it makes a difference-and a measurable difference in the quality of our lives, both for the giver of the random acts and the receiver. The research is impressive: It can help reduce depression and anxiety, it stimulates serotonin, it produces oxytocin, which is helpful if you are feeling anxious or shy in a social situation, and it increases a sense of self-worth.

Maria sat across from me, her medical chart showing encouraging numbers - normal blood pressure, cholesterol and blood sugar. By medical standards, she was healthy. But her eyes told a different story. "I've done everything right," she said. "I exercise five times a week, I eat organic food, I take all my vitamins. But I feel empty, like something is wrong - and I'm tired all the time."