Looking back on my own decades in life-student, waiter, pilot, FBI agent, graduate student, author, speaker-I can honestly say I've felt like an imposter at nearly every stage. From my first solo flight in a Cessna 152 at 17 to my first arrest of human traffickers in the Sonoran Desert, miles from any help, I often wondered, Do I belong here? Am I ready? Even as I rose through the ranks, I sometimes asked myself: Did I earn this, or am I fooling everyone?
The wisdom here isn't about self-deprecation, but rather embracing what Davis et al. (2011) refer to as the "just right view of the self." When we clearly understand both our strengths and weaknesses, we gain a better understanding of the value we bring to our environment as well as where we need additional support. In theory, when we recognize this, neither flattery nor insult should have the power to distort our self-worth.
The sense that we are a solid entity, an unchanging entity that exists someplace in our body and takes ownership of our body, and even ownership of our brain rather than being identical to our brain, that is where the illusion lies.
The latest season of Netflix's Black Mirror features an episode where users can optimise their lives through an app, impacting their self-perception profoundly.
