#misunderstood-moms
#misunderstood-moms
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#parenting #mental-health #motherhood #family-dynamics #work-life-balance #parenthood #parenting-challenges
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 hour agoThe hardest thing about being the calm one in a family is that your steadiness becomes load-bearing. Everyone leans on it, nobody asks what holds it up, and the day you finally crack, people don't comfort you. They panic. Because your collapse threatens the architecture, and the architecture was always more important than you were. - Silicon Canals
The calm family member often bears the burden of emotional labor, managing others' feelings while suppressing their own.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoThere's a generation of men who were taught that providing was the same as loving. And there's a generation of their children who spent years in therapy learning that those aren't the same thing, only to reach an age where they finally understand that for their fathers, inside the architecture they were given, it was. - Silicon Canals
Emotional estrangement between fathers and children stems from generational differences in expressing love and vulnerability.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoThere is a particular loneliness in being a man whose body never matched the archetype he was taught to aspire to. Not because anyone was cruel about it, but because the world built its furniture, its expectations, and its respect around a size he would never reach. - Silicon Canals
Body image issues in men stem from societal expectations and architectural norms, leading to a profound, often unacknowledged loneliness.
Retirement
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoTough it out' was the only emotional instruction a whole generation of men ever received - and now they're sitting in retirement wondering why their body aches and nobody calls - Silicon Canals
Retirement brings a realization of emotional neglect and the need for deeper connections among men.
fromTruthout
5 days agoLow-Income Moms Struggle to Keep Their Families Afloat Amid Gas Price Increases
Luna Rosado, a single mother, has seen her gas expenses rise by $40 weekly due to a 30 percent increase in prices after the war in Iran. This has resulted in $160 less for groceries and other necessities each month, forcing her to constantly adjust her budget.
Washington DC
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
4 hours agoNobody teaches children how to know their own worth - we teach them to perform, to achieve, and to behave, and then wonder why so many adults reach fifty still measuring themselves against someone else's ruler - Silicon Canals
Self-worth is inherent and not based on achievements or external validation.
fromLGBTQ Nation
22 hours agoOut WNBA star pens moving letter to her toddler on his 2nd birthday: "It kind of blows my mind" - LGBTQ Nation
On one of the most important nights of my career, the night of the WNBA draft, I wasn't able to have your mom standing by my side. I called her when I was in the green room, when I finally got a moment to sneak away, and she was so excited for me. She's screaming on the phone, like, 'LET'S GOOOOO!!!' She had already been a part of so many highs and lows. She understood how much this meant to me.
Women
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoYou know a woman has lost her joy in life when she describes her days accurately and without feeling - when the words are all correct and the tone is completely flat and the account of her own life sounds like something being reported rather than lived, and she doesn't notice the flatness because she has been inside it long enough that it just sounds like how things are - Silicon Canals
Emotional flatness can creep in, making life feel like a series of tasks rather than meaningful experiences.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoThe most painful version of not belonging isn't being rejected by strangers. It's sitting at your own family's dinner table, surrounded by people who share your last name, and feeling like you're watching the evening through glass. - Silicon Canals
Belonging can exist alongside profound loneliness, where one feels unseen even in the presence of family and friends.
Social justice
fromwww.theguardian.com
5 days agoIs calling a woman auntie' ageist harassment or a mark of respect? It's a trickier question than you think | Lola Okolosie
Respecting how individuals wish to be addressed is essential, as demonstrated by the tribunal ruling in favor of Ilda Esteves against Charles Oppong.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoThere's a specific kind of tiredness that has nothing to do with sleep. It comes from years of translating yourself into a version that other people could handle, and the exhaustion lives in the gap between who you are and who you've been performing so consistently that even you forgot there was a difference. - Silicon Canals
Workplace burnout often stems from the exhaustion of pretending to be someone you're not, rather than from overwork itself.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
16 hours agoThe hardest part of growing up lower middle class wasn't the lack of money. It was learning to want things quietly, because visible desire in a household running on tight margins felt like an accusation against the people who were already giving everything they had. - Silicon Canals
Emotional training around scarcity shapes behavior in lower middle class childhoods, teaching children to suppress desires to avoid adding stress to their families.
#parenting
Parenting
fromSlate Magazine
1 day agoMy Daughter Made an Honest Mistake While Babysitting Her Cousins. My Sister Is Taking It Too Far.
Beatrice should take responsibility for her actions and communicate with her aunt about the incident.
Parenting
fromPsychology Today
1 day agoWhen Your Adult Child Says 'I Hate You' and Then Wants Money
Emotional outbursts from adult children often stem from overload, and parents should change their responses to reset dynamics.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoI'm 66 and I recently told my son that I was proud of him for the first time in his adult life, and the look on his face told me everything about the cost of assuming that providing for someone communicates the same thing as telling them they matter - Silicon Canals
Verbal expressions of pride are crucial for emotional connection between parents and children.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology says parents who can't stop helping their adult children aren't being loving - they're unconsciously protecting themselves from the terror of becoming unnecessary - Silicon Canals
Parental overinvolvement may stem from a fear of irrelevance rather than solely from love.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoI'm 66 and I recently told my son that I was proud of him for the first time in his adult life, and the look on his face told me everything about the cost of assuming that providing for someone communicates the same thing as telling them they matter - Silicon Canals
Verbal expressions of pride are crucial for emotional connection between parents and children.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology says parents who can't stop helping their adult children aren't being loving - they're unconsciously protecting themselves from the terror of becoming unnecessary - Silicon Canals
Parental overinvolvement may stem from a fear of irrelevance rather than solely from love.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoChildren who were praised for being smart rather than for working hard often become adults who avoid challenges - not from laziness but from a deep fear of being found ordinary - Silicon Canals
Praising children for being 'smart' can hinder their growth mindset and willingness to take risks.
#aging
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoPsychology says the reason aging people feel like they don't matter isn't about what they've lost - it's that society defines mattering as productivity and visibility, and the moment you step outside those narrow roles, your value becomes invisible even to people who love you - Silicon Canals
Retirement and aging can lead to feelings of invisibility and worthlessness due to society's narrow definitions of productivity.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoThe most painful thing about watching a parent age isn't the physical decline. It's the moment you catch them deferring to you on a decision they would have made without hesitation ten years ago, and you both feel the transfer of authority that neither of you agreed to. - Silicon Canals
The real challenge of aging parents lies in the subtle shifts of authority and uncertainty in their decision-making.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says people who grew up poor and became successful often can't fully enjoy it - not because they're ungrateful, but because some part of them never stopped waiting for it to disappear - Silicon Canals
Successful individuals often struggle with feelings of scarcity and anxiety about their financial stability, despite their achievements.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoChildren raised in the 1960s and 70s developed their resilience the same way muscle develops under resistance - not by being protected from the load but by being required to carry it, repeatedly, without assistance, until the carrying became the unremarkable default rather than the exceptional achievement - Silicon Canals
Independence and resilience were fostered in children of the '60s and '70s through unstructured play and learning from failure.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPeople who were labeled 'too sensitive' often became adults who read rooms before anyone speaks, and the difference between those two things is about 20 years of misunderstanding - Silicon Canals
Sensitivity can evolve from a perceived weakness into a valuable skill for understanding emotional dynamics in various situations.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoThere's a specific exhaustion that belongs to people who spent decades being exactly what everyone needed them to be - and then one day realized they couldn't remember what they needed - Silicon Canals
People-pleasing leads to losing one's identity and can result in profound exhaustion and disconnection from self.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoI grew up with a mother who was physically there but emotionally unreachable - and the confusion that produced, the child's inability to grieve a parent who is standing right in front of them, is the thing I have spent the most years in therapy trying to untangle and the thing I understood least for the longest - Silicon Canals
Emotional absence from a present parent can lead to profound feelings of unworthiness in a child.
fromwww.bbc.com
2 weeks agoI spent five months in a mother and baby mental health unit - here's what I want mums to know
Sofii Lewis described her experience, stating, "I knew I wasn't safe. But I didn't think I was out of control." This highlights the confusion many face with postpartum psychosis.
Mental health
Left-wing politics
fromwww.theguardian.com
1 month agoThe right has won the family': why are there so few lefty momfluencers?
Polished mommy-influencer content soothes with domestic routines but sparks anxiety about creators' politics, driving a desire for algorithmic feeds that confirm progressive values.
fromScary Mommy
2 months agoThis Mom Says That The Woman With The Happiest Relationships Are "Useless"
"The smartest women with the happiest relationships are the useless women," Dianna Lee begins in her video. "As you can probably tell, I'm a highly capable woman. I'm capable throughout all areas of my life, through my schooling days, to my career, and I attacked my marriage life in exactly the same way. I just executed. I was fast, efficient, and I knew exactly what needed to get done. And in retrospect, it was so wrong."
Relationships
Parenting
fromScary Mommy
2 weeks agoFor The Overwhelmed Moms Trying To Do It All, You Can Blame "Institutional Lag"
Afternoon chaos for working mothers stems from institutional lag—outdated systems designed for single-income households with stay-at-home parents that fail to accommodate modern dual-income families.
Parenting
fromBusiness Insider
3 weeks agoI found making friends as a new mom so hard. A stranger on the street changed everything.
A stranger's act of kindness in offering a stroller sparked a lasting friendship that evolved into a close-knit group of mother friends who support each other through motherhood.
Parenting
fromwww.theguardian.com
4 weeks agoI went into motherhood an oblivious idiot - and I don't regret it | Emma Beddington
Excessive knowledge about motherhood's challenges creates ambivalence about having children, while insufficient knowledge leaves parents unprepared for the reality of parenthood.
fromPsychology Today
1 month agoWho Gets to Be a Mother?
We'd been working together for years to make my medication regimen-treatment for schizoaffective disorder-safe for potential pregnancy. Under her care, I was tapering off an antidepressant known to cause respiratory distress and hypertension in a newborn. I'd been experiencing wild mood swings, even suicidal thoughts. My beloved doctor's eyes were sad. "I'm saying no to a pregnancy, Meg." Even in the moment, I understood her priority as a physician was to keep me safe. Still, part of me hated her.
Mental health
Mental health
fromwww.theguardian.com
1 month agoHonesty about the realities of motherhood, and proper NHS support, would go a long way | Letters
Perinatal care and societal narratives often neglect and fail women experiencing severe mental health issues after childbirth, leaving many without adequate support.
fromBusiness Insider
2 months agoI stayed home while my family traveled because I needed a break. I loved my alone time.
I wouldn't have to answer to anyone or for anything. Not requests for snacks or one more backrub. I wouldn't have to sit rigid, wondering if one of my three kids was creeping out of a bed that wasn't theirs. Or defend my parenting style while my oldest yelled about how life wasn't fair and we must all really hate him,
Mental health
Parenting
fromBuzzFeed
1 month ago16 Parents Confess The Brutally Honest Reasons Why They Regret Having Kids, And It's Important
A woman who had a child due to cultural pressure rather than personal desire experiences parenting as responsibility without maternal fulfillment, and would choose not to have children if given the choice.
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