You're riding a huge range of emotions right now, and no one could blame you. I'm glad to hear that you got yourself out of that abusive relationship, and I absolutely champion any measures you have at your disposal to tend to your mental and physical well-being, especially by building out a circle of friends and family who you can trust and talk to.
I know you say you don't have the time or money for therapy, but I urge you to reconsider whether you can find some way to make it work. The National Domestic Violence Hotline has a directory where you can search for counseling in your state.
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