"The White House, it seems, will be ending the war on protein, per a tweet with the words "WE ARE ENDING THE WAR ON PROTEIN" emblazoned over an ominously hazy photo of some haunted specter assuming the form of Robert F. Kennedy Jr., white hair and deeply furrowed forehead dissolving into a shroud of darkness like Homer into the hedge."
"I have tried and enjoyed the Eggo Buttermilk Protein Waffles and the Barilla Protein+ Penne. Sometimes after working out I drink a protein juice with the flavor "Fuzzy Navel" (I am not proud of this). If there has indeed been a war on protein, surely Protein must have pulled off a flanking maneuver, soldiers massacred by the battalion by Starbucks's new lineup of Protein Lattes, featuring protein-boosted milk and "a variety of protein cold foams";"
On Jan. 11 the White House posted a tweet proclaiming "WE ARE ENDING THE WAR ON PROTEIN" with a hazy image resembling Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and linked to realfood.gov displaying a slab of steak, a carton of whole milk, and a floret of broccoli under the slogan "Real food starts here." There is no actual war on protein; protein is ubiquitous in U.S. food marketing and product design. Examples include Eggo Buttermilk Protein Waffles, Barilla Protein+ Penne, protein juices like "Fuzzy Navel," Starbucks' Protein Lattes with protein cold foams, Pure Genius Ready Clear Protein Water with 20g whey isolate, and Khloe Kardashian's Khloud protein popcorn. The tone is satirical and skeptical of the messaging.
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