"I used to think I was over my startup failure. That was three years ago, ancient history, right? Yet every time I pitched a new idea to someone, my hands would shake. Every investor meeting felt like walking into that same room where I had to tell my team we were shutting down. My body remembered what my mind tried to forget. That's when Bruce Springsteen's words hit me like a freight train: "The past is never the past. It is always present. And you'd better reckon with it in your life and in your daily experience, or it will get you. It will get you really bad.""
"Here's what nobody tells you about unresolved stuff from your past: it doesn't just disappear because you decided to "move on." When my second startup failed spectacularly after burning through investor money in eighteen months, I thought I'd processed it. Filed it under "learning experience" and marched forward. But my nervous system had other plans. Six months later, I found myself over-explaining every decision at my new job. Triple-checking emails before hitting send. Arriving thirty minutes early to meetings "just in case." Sound familiar?"
Unresolved past experiences can remain embodied in the nervous system and influence present reactions, decisions, and relationships. Past failures may trigger physical reactions like shaking hands, heightened anxiety in meetings, and habits such as over-explaining or perfectionism. Behavioral patterns like chronic procrastination, boundary difficulties, and constant apologies can signal unresolved trauma or stress responses. External validation or rationalizing an experience as a "learning" step may not resolve underlying physiological memory. Recognizing these patterns helps identify when past events continue to shape current behavior and when targeted work on the nervous system and coping strategies may be needed.
Read at Silicon Canals
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