"Romantic relationships are emotionally complex, and conflicting feelings toward a partner are natural. One way to manage this tension is by differentiating between global and specific evaluations. Psychologists Lisa Neff and Benjamin Karney (2005) proposed a model in which spouses maintain a positive overall view of their partner ("wonderful") while still recognizing specific flaws ("not punctual"). Similarly, global hate doesn't necessarily erase the recognition of attractive traits in the hated person."
"Love and hate both express strong, global evaluations of another person. While it may seem contradictory, it is possible to hate someone you love-especially after betrayal or deep hurt. In some cases, this hatred paradoxically preserves a sense of closeness when other forms of communication fail. Such hate is often temporary and fades over time. Romantic relationships are emotionally complex, and conflicting feelings toward a partner are natural."
Romantic partners often maintain a positive overall view of each other while also recognizing specific flaws, allowing both admiration and contempt to coexist. Love and hate can be strong, global evaluations that sometimes alternate, especially after betrayal or deep hurt, and such hate may be temporary. Sexual desire and anger are emotionally charged, partial evaluations that can coexist in relationships, producing paradoxical dynamics like hate sex. Makeup sex tends to aim at repairing emotional bonds, whereas hate sex tends to be selfish, aggressive, and emotionally detached, often reinforcing rather than healing emotional wounds.
Read at Psychology Today
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