Living with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) presents a complex mix of compulsions and triggers, particularly exacerbating symptoms among trusted individuals. Diagnosed at 16, the author reflects on their lifelong struggles with compulsions like checking and memory hoarding. While some aspects of OCD can be leveraged positively, such as enhanced typing skills, daily interactions become challenging, especially when the mind is preoccupied with intrusive thoughts. The journey involves actively managing these compulsions, particularly when navigating personal relationships.
I have no recollection of life before it. My main categories are checking, symmetry/exactness, and a symptom I’ve seen anecdotally referred to as ‘memory hoarding.’
I’ve learned to appreciate some aspects of my condition. My desire to take verbatim notes makes me an excellent typer.
If my mind grabs onto a word or even text on a billboard, I lose focus and stop processing whatever I’m supposed to be doing.
The symptoms of my OCD intensify around people I’m comfortable with. I’m working on fighting my compulsions when I’m around my partner.
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