When Friendships End

"According to the "conceptual model" of friendship loss in adulthood-created in 2022 by Vieth et al.-the end of a friendship can hit just as hard as other types of relational loss (like a divorce or a death in the family). Yet while the importance of romantic breakups or losses via end of life is well recognized, not as much research or discussion has been afforded to breakups of close friendships."

"Friendship loss can hurt as deeply as romantic or bereavement loss, even in the absence of death or drama. How a friendship ends is important: Abrupt conflict fuels anger, while ambiguity fuels doubt and grief. Cultural myths of "forever friends" and self-blame schemas intensify the pain of friendship loss. Grieving friendships is healthy; honoring their meaning may matter more than making them last."

Friendship dissolution often produces a psychological and emotional cost comparable to divorce or death. The way a friendship ends shapes emotional response: abrupt conflict tends to fuel anger, while ambiguous endings provoke doubt and prolonged grief. Cultural expectations of lifelong friends and internalized self-blame amplify distress and complicate recovery. Close friendships contribute to identity and psychological wellness, so their loss can disrupt self-concept. Allowing space to grieve friendships and honoring their meaning supports emotional repair and may matter more than attempting to force a relationship to last.

Read at Psychology Today