"People find it so hard to talk about sex, so if someone takes the time to sit down and write a question, then send it to the Guardian for me to answer, I always regard that as a great privilege. In the 20 years of writing the column, I have been reminded how many people are still out there, living their lives in quiet desperation about something that's really troubling them sexually."
"So many people grow up without the message that sex is healthy and important for a person's quality of life, and they feel guilty every time they have sex, or think a sexual thought. They haven't been able to enjoy sexuality and discover who they really are. Sometimes, it's not the sexuality that is causing someone's problem, it's societal notions prioritising monogamy, for instance that makes life difficult."
"One of the things I would have liked to have addressed more was sexuality when people have serious disabilities or illness. Many people think they can't continue to be sexual beings, and often that idea is pushed by people around them that, to me, is tragic. As the column went on, I did start to notice that readers seemed to have a greater understanding of sexual issues."
Many people find talking about sex difficult and often experience quiet desperation over sexual problems. Lack of education leaves people feeling guilty about sexual thoughts and activity, preventing enjoyment and self-discovery. Societal expectations such as strict monogamy can create additional sexual distress. People with serious disabilities or illness frequently face the false assumption that they cannot continue to be sexual beings, often reinforced by others. Awareness and acceptance of gender identity have grown, and social changes such as dating apps and casual hooking up have altered dating patterns. Persistent issues include low desire and mismatched sexual interest between partners.
Read at www.theguardian.com
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