Modern perspectives on love often prioritize gentle communication and avoid conflict entirely, considering arguments a sign of failure. However, this approach fails to acknowledge the natural dynamics of relationships, which can benefit from challenges and difficult conversations. In fact, some couples emerge stronger after facing crises, illustrating that emotional pain can lead to growth and resilience. Key figures like Nassim Nicholas Taleb and the Gottmans highlight that just as muscles thrive under stress, relationships too can become 'anti-fragile', reinforcing the idea that it's not the conflicts but the repairs that matter in enduring partnerships.
Good relationships aren't low-conflict; they're high-repair. Some of the most resilient couples we know argue about all sorts: money, parenting, sex.
The trouble with this model is that it misses how love actually behaves in the wild. Relationships work the same way as muscles; appropriate stress makes them stronger.
#modern-relationships #conflict-resolution #emotional-growth #relationship-dynamics #communication-styles
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