Of Course You Can Bring Your Husband Along

"by which I mean that it'll be the two of you, plus me. Which is great, because you and I did all the logistical planning, and now your husband gets to benefit from our efforts while also adding his belated two cents about how "we should have gone to that new steak place" and "we can't stay out too late because of work tomorrow.""

"No, really, making small talk with your life partner is a wonderful way for me to practice my conversational skills. It's fun when he goes on and on about his boring and seemingly evil corporate job, which I can't comment on, of course, because then you two will get into a fight about it later and blame me. Seriously, it's electrifying how many third rails exist whenever he's around, such as politics, or any subject that doesn't revolve around him."

A friend's husband unexpectedly joins a long-awaited lunch, turning a planned one-on-one into a trio. He offers belated opinions on restaurant choices and imposes early departure constraints despite a noon start. He monopolizes conversation with declarative statements about his corporate job, avoids asking questions, and triggers conversational taboos that block vulnerability. His condescension toward shared interests and lack of genuine engagement forces the original pair to steer talk back to his preferences. The presence of the husband leaves the visiting friend sidelined, reluctant to share personal struggles, and resigned to performative small talk.

Read at The New Yorker