A couple has not been intimate for over two years, with the husband citing work-related stress and self-image as reasons. Despite a recent weight loss and a lighter job, he only occasionally uses a vibrator on her. The wife feels rejected and questions the longevity of their relationship. Seeking advice, the column suggests an ultimatum may not be necessary but emphasizes the importance of confronting underlying issues impacting their sex life. The husband exhibits guilt and avoidance regarding intimacy, indicating deeper unresolved problems.
An apparent lack of a sex drive could mean so many things, from low testosterone to stress to an identity crisis to ... stuff I don't even want to speculate on that I'm sure you've already worried enough about it as it is.
He has some discernible level of guilt and he keeps putting off sex, which means he knows he should want to do it, but for whatever reason he just can't bring himself to.
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